Goodnight My Favorite Mama

Tonight as I went into Holden's room to turn off the TV and tell him it was time for lights out. I noticed the clothes on the bathroom floor, the crumpled up towel on the bathroom sink, and the wide open shower curtain. So the "Mom" in me came out. "Holden, why are your clothes on the floor? Why isn't your towel hung up? Why is the shower curtain not pulled closed? And oh yeah...how do we put dishes in the dishwasher? Then why was your plate in the dishwasher with ketchup and dried up cheese still on it?"

As Holden got out of bed to do everything I asked him to do, I knew he was frustrated. He came in to say good night and was visibly distraught. When asked why he was upset, he said, "Nothing. Can I please just go to bed?" Once he got in bed he called for "Dad." Well, Jason wasn't feeling well, so I said I would go. When I got in Holden's room, he immediately said, "I wanted to talk to Dad." I knew it was to complain about me, but I went in anyway.

I asked him what was bothering him. I need to stop and admit that my flesh was upset that he would be so upset that I told him to do what he already knew what was supposed to be done. But he very maturely asked, "Why does the shower curtain need to be closed?" "Why do I have to hang up the towel?" My initial reaction wanted to be, "Because those are the rules and I said so." But I decided to try what Jason has been trying to get me to do. I explained the reasoning behind it. "The bathroom looks nicer when the shower curtain is closed. The towels will get mildewy and gross if not hung up to dry. It will be dry for you in the morning when you need to use it."

I could tell that because of the tone I was using, just a calm voice to explain it, that Holden was softening and not so frustrated. Then I decided to make it a little silly. I decided to explain why we rinse the dishes. I asked him if he wanted dried old ketchup and cheese with his pancakes tomorrow with his breakfast? Or better yet the old dried Ramen Noodles from Friday night in his scrambled eggs?

Well the giggles started. Holden said, "Mom, lay down with me and let's be silly and talk about gross food."
How could I resist? I crawled up in bed with him and we proceeded to think about all we had eaten this week and how gross our food would be with all the dried up old food all mixed up with tomorrow's breakfast. We were both laughing hard.

Then my sweet boy started playing with my hair, and we talked about what we were gonna go buy tomorrow to put in the shoebox for Samaritan's Purse. I told him to go get my brush so he could brush my hair. He came back empty handed saying he couldn't find it. When I got up to go get it, he tried to stop me and said, "No don't go because you won't come back, and I want to lay with you and be silly."

He wanted my time and laughter, and my first visit started with nagging about picking up this, and hanging up that...blah blah blah....nothing near as important--nothing near as eternal as laying in bed with my precious nine year old son, just being silly.

I came back right away with my brush. He told me to lay down while he brushed my hair and to keep talking about what we were gonna put in the box.

Ten minutes or so later, when I was getting up to leave he said, "Mom, I had fun being silly with you." As I walked out of the room, I heard, "Goodnight My Favorite Mama." I stopped, walked back, and gave him a kiss on the forehead and said, "Good night my favorite son."

WOW...what started out me being a naggy mom, turned into a sweet memory for both of us.

As I started to type this post, I went back in his room and asked, "Remember when I came in your room and immediately began to give you a list of things that you didn't do? He very reluctantly said, "Yeah?" (I think he thought I was gonna start all over again.) But instead I did what my pride has kept me from doing. Instead I said, "Well that was wrong of me and I am sorry." He looked up at me in the dark with his blue eyes and said, "Yeah but then you wouldn't have come back to talk to me, and we never would have had our silly time."

Our little man is wise beyond his years. I hope we will have more of those silly time together...and sometimes--we can leave the clothes on the floor, the towel crumpled up on the sink, and (heaven forbid) the shower curtain wide open.

Good night my favorite son.